People reveal themselves if you’re paying attention. So if you know and enforce your deal breakers it can be really easy to avoid heartbreak. Of course, that’s easier said than done when you’re really hot for someone. As a breakup coach, I talk to a lot of heartbroken clients who …
How To Avoid Bad Dating Advice From Friends
Being single can be frustrating for many reasons. The annoyance of having to put up with everyone else’s opinion about your love life makes singledom even worse. This nosey concern is typically followed by well-meaning tips to help you find “your person.” However, being in a relationship doesn’t make you qualified to …
Told to Stop Yelling When You Didn’t Feel You Were?
Have you been told to stop yelling when you didn’t feel like you were yelling? You may have even replied, “I’m not yelling, trust me, you’ll know when I am yelling.” However, what you need to hear is that you don’t have to raise your voice to be yelling — …
Pay Attention to Clues of Bad Behavior (Red Flags)
After a breakup I always ask my clients if they know what went wrong. Just about all of them can point to at least one thing that happened that foreshadowed their breakup, they just didn’t pay attention to those clues of bad behavior. You can save yourself a lot of heartache and also time …
“I’ve Never Felt This Way Before” Can Be a Huge Red Flag
Love is hard to find, so when you hear, “I’ve never felt this way before” you may think you’ve finally found “the one”. But have you? Be careful — it may mean you’re heading for disappointing heartbreak. If you’ve dated a lot but have never truly fallen in love before you have …
Why You Should Date Someone Who is Divorced
A lot of single people search for someone who’s “never been married”. I certainly do understand the romantic notion that you could be each other’s first marriage. However, as you get older it’s harder and harder to find people who have never taken vows; and you undoubtedly find many people …
Confidence is Different Than Self Esteem
Many highly successful people have tremendous confidence but low self-esteem. Confidence is different than self esteem. Do you know the difference? Self-esteem and self-confidence frequently get mistaken for one another, but they are two separate things. Self-confidence is your belief in your ability to do something, such as managing a business, speaking …
Be Careful With Others Feelings
Being negligent or insensitive with a lover’s feelings or worse intentionally hurting them is mean, and can cause you a lot of unnecessary grief. Being on the receiving end of uncaring actions is typically what leads a jilted lover to obsessive and even stalking behaviors. So protect yourself from future …
Do Opposites Attract or Is Commonality Better?
You frequently hear that opposites attract but then also hear that like attracts like. So which is it? Do opposites attract or is commonality better? If you’re a follower of my blog then you know that I believe commonality is crucial to making a relationship last long-term. You need to …
5 Examples of Inappropriate Boundaries
Being in a relationship with someone doesn’t give you permission to be part of everything in their life. Time apart from each other is actually necessary to keep you both happy, and snooping is never helpful. Do you know if you have inappropriate boundaries? Part of having healthy boundaries is accepting your …
10 Texting Rules to Help Your Relationship
I’m not a fan of rules for relationships but texting is one of the worst ways to communicate with a lover. It’s lazy and vague. The true meaning is left up to the reader’s interpretation. As a relationship coach, I have spent far too much time trying to calm down a …
First Date or One Night Stand?
There is no guarantee to see each other again if you have sex on the first date. Are you ok with a one night stand? If it’s going really well and you decide to have sex that first night, be really clear that you may be choosing a one night …
Dating Out of Your League
If you’re feeling like you’re dating out of your league or in any way not good enough for the person you’re dating then he or she will ultimately decide that too. Because you are what you think you are. Your behavior, actions, and insecurities are all created by your thoughts, and they become …
Signs Your Single-Self Is Too Picky
“Why are you still single?” is a commonly asked question that is essentially a backward compliment. It implies “Wow, you’re great, why doesn’t anybody want you?” The most common responses are: “I just haven’t met anyone I have chemistry with.” “The one I wanted got away.” “All the good ones …
5 Tips to Handle First Date Nerves
Do you get nervous on dates? Be careful, you may be sending the wrong message to your date — that you’re not interested. The most common reason people get nervous is because they want their date to like them. Unfortunately, that is usually what causes the date to fail. If you …