Pay Attention to Clues of Bad Behavior (Red Flags)

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After a breakup I always ask my clients if they know what went wrong. Just about all of them can point to at least one thing that happened that foreshadowed their breakup, they just didn’t pay attention to it at the time. You can save yourself a lot of heartache and also time if …

The First 3 to 6 Months of a Relationship

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The first six months of a relationship are the honeymoon phase. However, most relationships never last past three to six months. You have to protect your heart so you don’t get blindsided. Many people are desperately looking for “the one”.  They hopefully go on date after date, trying not to …

“I’ve Never Felt This Way Before” Can Be a Huge Red Flag

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Love is hard to find, so when you hear, “I’ve never felt this way before” you may think you’ve finally found “the one”. But have you? Be careful — it may mean you’re heading for disappointing heartbreak. If you’ve dated a lot but have never truly fallen in love before you have …

Why You Should Date Someone Who is Divorced

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A lot of single people search for someone who’s “never been married”. I certainly do understand the romantic notion that you could be each other’s first marriage. However, as you get older it’s harder and harder to find people who have never taken vows; and you undoubtedly find many people …

Confidence is Different Than Self-Esteem

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Many highly successful people have tremendous confidence but low self-esteem. Do you know the difference? Self-esteem and self-confidence frequently get mistaken for one another, but they are two separate things. Self-confidence is the belief in one’s ability to do something, such as managing a business, speaking in public, playing sports, or even …

Be Careful With Other’s Feelings

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Being negligent or insensitive with a lover’s feelings or worse intentionally hurting them is mean, and can cause you a lot of unnecessary grief. Being on the receiving end of uncaring actions is typically what leads a jilted lover to obsessive and even stalking behaviors. So protect yourself from future …

Are You The Rebound?

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You always hear that you’re not supposed to talk about past relationships when you first start dating someone new. However, the one exception to that rule is to find out whether he/she is truly available for a new relationship or if you’re just the rebound. Ask permission to ask by saying, “Can I ask …

Don’t Get Married Younger Than 25

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Falling in love is exciting. When you think you’ve found “the one” its fun to fantasize about walking down the aisle together. Nonetheless, if you haven’t celebrated your twenty-fifth birthday yet you should not actually plan the wedding — or worse, go through with getting married. Recent research has found that the Brain’s …

5 Examples of Inappropriate Boundaries

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Being in a relationship with someone doesn’t give you permission to be part of everything in their life. Time apart from each other is actually necessary to keep you both happy, and snooping is never helpful. So how appropriate are your boundaries? Part of having healthy boundaries is accepting your partner’s boundaries …

10 Texting Rules to Help Your Relationship

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I’m not a fan of rules for relationships but texting is one of the worst ways to communicate with a lover. It’s lazy and vague. The true meaning is left up to the reader’s interpretation. As a relationship coach, I have spent far too much time trying to calm down a …

Dating Out of Your League

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If you’re feeling like you’re not good enough for the person you’re dating then he or she will ultimately decide that too. Because you are what you think you are. Your behavior, actions, and insecurities all reflect your thoughts and are transparent to your partner. So if you don’t want to lose him …

When & How to Reveal Your Past Hardships

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Being an open book is a sign of unhealthy boundaries. If you reveal deeply personal info about your past too soon you’re waving bright red flags to the person you’re trying to endear to you. There is a time and place for everything. The first few months of dating is supposed to be about having …

Signs Your Single-Self Is Too Picky

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“Why are you still single?” is a commonly asked question that is essentially a backward compliment. It implies “Wow, you’re great, why doesn’t anybody want you?” The most common responses are: “I just haven’t met anyone I have chemistry with.” “The one I wanted got away.” “All the good ones …

5 Tips to Handle First Date Nerves

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Do you get nervous on dates? Be careful, you may be sending the wrong message to your date — that you’re not interested. The most common reason people get nervous is because they want their date to like them. Unfortunately, that is usually what causes the date to fail. If you …

Red Flags You Need to Heed

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If you know what red flags to look for in the beginning of a relationship then you can make a better decision about who is a keeper and who is just fun for right now. When you observe red flag behavior don’t ignore it. I promise you it will get worse if …