Love can conquer all. It sounds so simple, right? Wrong!
One of the hardest concepts to accept is that loving someone just isn’t enough. Too many men and women allow themselves to become doormats because they believe true love will triumph. They’re convinced that there will never be another person they will love as much, so they hang on to their relationship even when their love is not appropriately returned or appreciated. They make all sorts of excuses for their partner’s bad or even abusive behavior, all in the name of love. But that’s not real love. That’s the kind of dysfunction that gives love a bad name.
Love isn’t supposed to hurt. True love feels great! It helps keep you happy and in good health, and it helps you feel empowered.
So what exactly is true love? To start with, it’s mutual between both partners. Each genuinely cares about the other’s well-being and happiness. In a real partnership, it’s never “all about you.” True lovers respect each other’s feelings and keep intimate information in confidence; they don’t want or need to share everything about the relationship with their friends and family. They allow their partner to be who she is and do the things she enjoys, whether or not that includes them. They trust each other to always value the relationship. That includes being faithful and acting in their partner’s best interest. When you truly love someone, you never want to hurt her or cause her pain.
You can tell you’re truly in love when simply being in your partner’s company comforts you. You feel content and good about yourself. That comfort carries over even when you’re not together. You don’t need to be with your partner all the time, but you’re proud to include him in anything that you do. Your partner is your best friend. He is the first person you want to share news with, good or bad, and you can talk to him about anything. When love is right, it’s easy.
If you need more help recognizing what you’re doing wrong or finding who could be right for you I offer personal coaching. You’ll also find more help in my book: Giving Up Junk-Food Relationships: Recipes for Healthy Choices