An Open Book is Not Sexy

DonnaBarnes Dating Advice 1 Comment

A first date is supposed to be about enjoying each other’s company and finding out if you have chemistry and commonality—but also making sure you don’t do anything to turn your date off.

Being an open book is not sexy! Talking too much or revealing too much too soon is a turn-off. If your date ends up never wanting to see you again then he or she definitely doesn’t need to know everything about you. Less is more! Leave the important details for another date in the future. A little mystic is attractive.

The point of the first date is to inspire a second date. You should share light and friendly conversation without lingering too long on any one topic. Make your stories succinct and bottom line the important stuff. If anything about you, your family, or your past is less than flattering (even if you think it’s funny) there is no need to reveal it to a date. Quirky traits or complicated situations are better received when someone is already falling in love with you. Timing is everything.

Revealing too much about yourself too soon is a sign of underdeveloped boundaries. It shouldn’t feel okay to give up intimate details about yourself before establishing trust. Trust has to be earned, and that takes time. Knowledge is power. Don’t give yours away.

Read more about how to create a healthy, long-lasting relationship in my book: Giving Up Junk-Food Relationships: Recipes for Healthy Choices