Being in a relationship with someone doesn’t give you permission to be part of everything in their life. Time apart from each other is actually necessary to keep you both happy, and snooping is never helpful. So how appropriate are your boundaries?
Part of having healthy boundaries is accepting your partner’s boundaries — whether or not he or she verbally expressed them. People frequently don’t have the courage to stand up for themselves, but that doesn’t mean they actually like what is happening.
5 Examples of Inappropriate Boundaries
- Showing up where you weren’t invited.
- Get yourself invited to something you feel insecure about being left out of.
- Looking at your lover’s phone or computer.
- Snooping through their things or photos.
- Calling or seeing your partner’s family or friends without their knowledge (unless you’re planning a surprise).
It’s creepy, needy, and also stalking if you show up somewhere you know your significant other will be when they didn’t ask you to come. You should look away when your partner is accessing their phone or computer, which is their private business. Under no circumstance should you read texts or emails without being shown them by your partner.
Trust is vital to the success of a relationship. You need to enforce healthy boundaries to maintain trust.